Not officially not a toilet.

Everyone loses.

A recipe for Crunchy Spinach Mac-asserole
(AKA Weird-but-sort-of-familiar Pie)

-Take a giant bag of macaroni noodles. Place them in a pot. Fill the pot with water.
-Realize that you are supposed to add the noodles after the water is boiling. Fish out the noodles and decide on a smaller pot. (Re-add noodles when water boils). Boil noodles until they look good but are still hard and basically inedible.
-Put noodles in a casserole dish.
-Add an arbitrary amount of cream cheese.
-Add an arbitrary amount of spinach.
-Add an arbitrary amount of green onions.
-Realize that you are out of bread crumbs, so put some sort of stale bread in toaster oven for a while. Crumble over casserole.
-Set oven to 350 degrees (or whatever). Bake until you remember that you had a casserole in the oven.
-Broil for 3 minutes.
-Marvel at the fact that broiling really can burn a casserole that fast.
-Scrape off burned top.
-Eat (while watching something vile).

Hurray for casserole!

Sound dream.

Doug Nufer and I were either in his wine shop or fishing in a yacht on the Puget Sound. We were going to invent punk rock. And we were going to brew beer in our basement. And then I was at a shooting range with Divine.

I woke up totally inspired. Had spaghetti for breakfast.

Temptation Bay

Nutria are no good with computers. That is a fact that you can put in a book and no one will argue with you. For instance: I needed to buy a plane ticket. I did it online. I went and saw my family (they all have great hair). I bought my return ticket to the wrong city. Incidentally, this may be how nutria got to the US in the first place. Don't put that fact in a book, please.

So that's how I wound up in San Francisco, anyway. Let me tell you something: it is kind of awesome. Never having been to California, I thought the best way to approach this would be to not plan anything. So far so good. I'm not dead yet. But we'll see, my tail might be worth more than five dollars in this big, fancy-book-lernin' city.

even nutria have limits

So it looks like I finally have a solid reason to ween myself from vitamin water. According to wikipedia (which is always, always right), Glaceau is being bought out by Coke.

It's OK. I didn't really need the electrolytes, anyway.

Ignored by Hollywood

The New York Times has something to say about Knocked Up. Thank you.

My breeding is OUT OF CONTROL.

True fact. Nutria do not stop with the fucking. Yet another reason to wear fur and fill a crockpot with my tasty ass. (That's two curses.)

So but D. and I went to go see Knocked Up yesterday. Heard of it? Yeah, it's all full of our best friends from Freaks and Geeks (1).

Right. It's a movie about baby-making, just to backtrack and make sure that you know what's up. It's about baby-making and making the baby-making right by sticking together, working it out, making the baby have mommy and daddy. I can get behind that. This situation reminds me a bit of my parents, so I also GET It a little bit.

But what is it really trying to say? I watched it, and I don't know. Judd Apatow's last movie was basically about waiting to have sex until marriage. You heard of that one? It's called The 40 Year Old Virgin (2). Are these funny jokes about asses and boobs and condoms (3) masking some kind of conservative, back-to-the-family-unit agenda? It's hard to say. D. and I talked about it. She's a smart lady. I'm pretty much the smartest guy I know. We still don't know. You should talk to me about this. Give me your opinion. Wait maybe until I have less caffeine in me. That would be nice. I will make more proper paragraph breaks.
1. including James Franco. la la.
2. Rent the rated version. The extra breasts just make the movie seem longer. Because it is.
3. Judd Apatow hates condoms, apparently. I have never seen someone have as difficult a time with a prophylactic. Sorry.